Getting Ready

My first post!  I decided to take this trip back in July - sitting in Chinatown having lunch, looking at a travel agency across the street dreaming again of going there, and then realizing that the only thing stopping me from going was me!

So far it's all been an adventure – deciding to go, plotting my trail, choosing accommodations, deciding what to take and shopping for what I don't have (mostly at the Village of Value). Part of the joy has been giving myself permission to indulge in the exploration I want to do.

I haven’t felt anxiety about launching into my trip yet, and I’m trying to plan for eventualities as much as possible – in recognition of the language barriers and possible panic at feeling lost and frustrated. I'm working on the language with phrase books, Mandarin lessons on CD, the Say It Right in Chinese translation system. I have Chinese and phonetic translations of place names and addresses that I checked with Foster (the Victoria agent from FlyGreatChina who arranged my travel), and translations from the accommodations themselves. I like the way Chinese sounds and feels  on my tongue.  I wonder if I'll have the courage to use it!  Well, I'm very comfortable with "Ni Hao"! (Hello)

Michelle told Ian that it will be good for me to do this trip.  She is a seasoned traveller and a wise person in many ways - in my imagination she meant that this will be an opportunity to: overcome some fears, experience the joy of travelling that we both share, and follow my dreams.

My cynical self knows that reality can be very different than the ideal. At the worst I might: not find China full of beauty, feel very out of place, stay in my room the whole time, get very sick, be lonely, go a little bit crazy, be in danger, have made the wrong choices, not remain open to the experience, and on and on.....  At the best I might find my wings and fly, be strengthened by my self-reliance, relish the license to set my own course, love my courage....  it’s likely that the reality will lie somewhere in between. I don’t want my practical self to drown out my best hopes.  And at the very least I will learn and I do love to learn.

Beth said that her trip to China changed her life as much as having a child.  I won’t speculate on how it might change mine. Maybe this trip really is motivated as a bucket list item, or it could be a distraction to keep my mind from going into negative places.  Perhaps both....